Free Agent Frenzy analysis....oh wait, I don't do that sort of thing.

"look into my eyes. you are getting sleepy. you will soon realize my plan is genius...."

First off, let me just say that Bob Gainey has lost his mind. I'm sure he has some sort of plan, I'm just not smart enough to figure it out. Right? In the words of someone on twitter "you can't hit what you can't see." I think that about sums up Bob's free agent signing philosophy.

I still love the moves the Flyers made. Sucks to lose Knuble, but they just couldn't afford him. Flyers are going to be a tough team to play against next year. Ouch.

On another note, I just wanted to point out a blog that you should be reading, Ronnybrook. He blogged on blogger for awhile, and now he's over on wordpress. You may recall him from his link on Puckdaddy a few weeks back, writing about the Flyers partying ways, and the ensuing backpeddling from the Flyers front office. Nice work.

Also, I thought there was someone else you should check out, but I can't remember who!

On another note, know which words I hate? "Embedding disabled by request." How am I supposed to post a rocking metal mania video to kick off your July 4th weekend?!?!?!

Quit yer belly-achin!

Lupul = 50 points last season
Pronger = 48 points last season.

Pronger will take a bitch out. The only bitches Lupul took out were the easy ones in Old City.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I think we all know how I feel about this trade. The Pronger is a Flyer!

I'm still nauseous...

I had a wedding to go to on Friday night, so I didn't get to watch the game. Said wedding was in the heart of Red Sox Nation, so the Phillies/Red Sox game was on in the bar. I had no reception on my iPhone, so I couldn't even check the score that way. I didn't even get a glimpse at the score until late in the third, right before the Red Wings scored and gave me a little hope.

I got home from Red Sox nation late yesterday afternoon and had to take a nap and write a few papers. Then I had to watch the premiere of True Blood (which was kinda lame). Once all that was over, I decided to watch the last minute or so of the game. Man, I really wish I hadn't. All those Pens squealing like little girls was really annoying. And Malkin with a shit eating grin on his face was more than I could bear. Honestly, I'm not going to be able to deal with this. The Pens winning is waaaaaaay worse than the Flyers not winning. Watching it made me feel sick to my stomach. And Crosby yelling wooooweeee when he picked up the Cup...how gay and annoying.

Ugh.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Man, Pens fans are going to be insufferable. Ugh.

Remember, Homer is a genius. Flyers sign Emery.

Yeah, so there is gonna be a press conference at the SkateZone at 11 today, but the Flyers are already announcing that they have come to terms on a contract with goaltender Ray Emery. Somewhere, Marty Biron is crying into his Flyers mask.

Flyers bloggers and journalists everywhere are bracing themselves for the golden material they are going to be able to work with over the next year.

Before we bash this idea, as I have been doing with all the Flyers fans at work, let's just take a moment to think about this. We already know that Paul Holmgren is a genius. His deal to get Timonen and Hartnell here was pure gold. Right? I think we can all agree that (on paper) his work during the 2007 Free Agent Season was brilliant. Sure, Briere didn't really work out, but for the most part, it's been a pretty good retooling. (We'll just ignore the bonehead moves that put the team over the cap and sent the glue in the lockerroom to Phoenix in exchange for a bag of pucks, err, Daniel Carcillo.)

I don't know much about the Em, other than that he dresses like a P-I-M-P and that's alright with me. I will be giving Homer and Emery the benefit of the doubt on this one.

Also, if this move is any indication, I think Homer is gonna be outta control crazy once July 1st hits (or sooner, as is his custom!)

Bad blogger, bad blogger!

I needed something to do with all my free time and money now that hockey season is over. I thought it would be fun to take a couple of summer classes. Boy was I wrong. I spent all day Saturday and Sunday reading and writing about the ancient Romans. No time for Metal Mania, Steve! I did get to watch part of the Wings/Pens game. My favorite part was when Fleury got pulled. I didn't even know who the Pens' backup goalie was at this point in the season. Garon? Really? Her?

Anyhow, its nose back to the grindstone for me, but let's just check out Steve's suggestion to check out the top 100 Hard Rock songs......OH NO! Oh dear. I kinda don't love GNR. But mostly because their songs are SUCH earworms. Just looking at the title of the song will keep it in my head for days. Anyhoo, here is number one:

Ha! He's so sprawly!

yeesh.

Wow. That third Malkin goal was pretty unbelievable. Seriously. I hate the dude and I hate his team, but wow.





Do we really need to see his mom every time he scores a goal? I mean, it's not like it's the first time she's at his game. We saw her all through the Caps series. Are there no other players' parents there that we could see instead? Are you jsut showing her because she looks like a short version of Malkin wearing a wig?

Also, is it just me, or is it impossible to tell Paul Maurice and Dan Bylsma apart? Seriously. If I didn't see which players were sitting in front of them, I would have no idea which one it was. Same haircut, same glasses, same puzzled look on their face. Anyone have any helpful hints for telling them apart?

The return of Metal Mania!

Yeah, it's a bit early in the off season to start metal mania, but since there was no hockey on Friday night, I happened to flip over to VH1 Classic. I think they used to only do Metal Mania on Saturday and Sunday nights, but hey, what do I know?

They played some Skid Row, which got me wondering which video/song is better?




or



I love Monkey Business, because it shows them at the height of their popularity, but Youth Gone Wild is great too, because it shows them at the beginning...all baby faced and trying to be snarly. Tough decision!

Kovalover

I forgot to post this! Thanks to Jess and Soph for this little gem, and congrats to them today as they graduaaaaaaaate! Woooooooohoooooo!

Thanks, Braceface!

Um, yeah. My Braceface does not look like this. At all.

I was at work yesterday, and a frequent customer of mine stopped by for her usual. I hadn't seen her in a while, so we made some small talk. She asked if I was going anywhere on holiday, and I told her I was headed to Montreal in June. She asked if I was going with anyone, and I said "I'm meeting a few friends there." She said, "You have friends?"

Ouch, Braceface. She didn't mean it in a mean way, so I didn't take it too hard. In fact, it sorta made my day, because it was just so funny and so brutally honest. She wanted to know if my friends were from around here, and I told her no, they were from all over....New Jersey, Canada, the West Coast. She said, "Oh. I'm looking for some friends."

Poor Braceface. I have to call her Braceface because she is a 30 year old woman with braces, and she's not quite pulling it off. Plus, she used to be mean so we had to give her an evil nickname.

So, friends, just 6 short weeks left until the draft. Who's gonna be there? I'm hopefully getting there Thursday night, and leaving on Sunday. No news on draft tickets yet, but I know y'all will keep me posted. I do have a backup plan in place in case I can't get tickets the usual way, more on that if it becomes necessary.

Happy Saturday to y'all, and look for the return of metal mania soon!

Oh crap, you mean I still have to write about hockey?

Don't fuck it up tonight, Hiller.

I actually love watching the playoffs once my team has been eliminated. I mean sure, there's not as much passion involved, but there's not as much stress either. You can sit back, relax, and not really care about the outcome of the game. As the game goes on, you realize who you're rooting for (unless it's Pens/Caps, then you know you're rooting for NotPens) and then you live and die with every goal.

However, now that the Flyers and Habs have been eliminated, I've gone back to a more night time related schedule at work. That has really been cutting into my game watching time. I would venture to say I have not watched one entire game since my teams were eliminated. Even when I have been able to watch, I tune in but the game barely holds my attention!!! What is wrong with me? Why am I burnt out on hockey? It's starting to scare me. I'm home tonight and well rested, so I am going to try and watch both games. I'll let you know how it goes!

Update: Well, I failed. I watched the first period of Canes/Bruins while flipping back and forth between Seinfeld. Then, flipping back and forth between Family Guy. Then I fell asleep on the couch at 8:40 and woke up around 9:45. Bad, bad, bad hockey fan. Let's see how I do with the Ducks game. Although honestly, it's 10:26 and I haven't started watching it yet. Sigh.

Really? Emery? Her?

Ray seems perplexed by the idea too...

H/T to Poor Richard's Scorecard for the find. I guess I've been negligent in keeping up with my Flyers' news!

Homer interested in Emery, Biron not worried.

oh gosh

I cannot root for either team in the Pens/Caps series. Right? I mean, I hate the Pens. Ovechkin drives me crazy. Pens fans are douches, Caps fans are idiots. It's a lose/lose situation right?

I can't root for the Broons. Canes are okay. They've got Leighton, so there's that.

Canucks? I don't believe I've ever watched a Canucks game in my entire life.

Chicago? Meh. Sure, they've got Eager, so there's that, but come on, that's not a lot to go on.

Detroit? Boring to root for them.

Ducks. Ducks. Ducks. The Pronger. Ducks all the way.

yeah, I got nothing. I guess we'll have to wait and see once the games get started.

Toyota Turning Point

Ah yeah! What a great first period and start to the second period! Goals! Lupul and Briere get off the schneid! A fight even! Wow! A fight in the playoffs, we're really getting our money's worth today! That will really get the crowd pumped up.

Uh oh. Wait. What just happened? Oh crap. Pens score. Oh great. Two stupid tripping penalties right in a row. You couldn't take Jordan Staal off his skates if you tried, that guy's a moose, but he falls when tapped on the leg like that? Oh crap. Another goal. Why can't the Flyers get the puck out of their own zone? It's not that hard guys. Oh my god, what is wrong with these guys? Why do I feel nauseous. They are going to blow this, aren't they? Gosh, it's kinda quiet and restless in here. At least we're not as quiet as the Pens fans were last game. God, why aren't they hitting anyone? Gah! Those two stupid penalties made them afraid to touch anyone. Oh crap. Another goal.

They'll get themselves together for the third, right? Stevens will yell at them and they will get their shit together. We're a good third period team, right? Wait, I know why the second period sucked...the guy next to me moved over a seat. Doesn't he know the rules about changing seats while the game is on? I'll have to tell him. He thinks I'm crazy. He's not moving back. I'll blame the loss on him! Oh shit, they still look awful. Not hitting. Wait, no shots on goal yet and 7 minutes gone by? They are gonna blow this. I can feel it. It's because I wanted them to win. No, it's because the guy next to me moved. God, they've completely fallen apart. No hitting, can't get it out, no heart. Poor guys. Oooh! The guy next to me moved back! Flyers immediately get a great scoring chance, only to hit the cross bar. If only the dumbass had moved back at the start of the third like I told him.

I hate when they pull the goalie. Ugh. Stupid Crosby. Ugh. Hey look, there's Mike Milbury. Wow. The season is over. I better take a picture of my seats, since I won't be back next year. Stupid Flyers. Stupid Penguins. Go Ducks! Go Canes!

get ready for more of this....

Carcillo!!!!!

yeah, I know this isn't a picture of Carcillo. It's a picture of bullshit. Whatevs.

Flyers lose again, despite outworking the Pens. Whatever. Just win tomorrow Pens and get it over with, so I can get a refund on Saturday's game.

I saw the most amazing thing last night. Carcillo scored a goal. A much needed, timely goal. The crowd at the Wachovia Center went nuts! It went to a tv timeout immediately after his goal, and the crowd stayed on its feet and applauded him at full force throughout the entire break. Like 3 minutes of deafening applause. It was unreal. Most of the crowd stayed on its feet for the rest of the game, and the cheering was out of control. I thought it was going to be enough to carry the Flyers through to victory, but MAF had other plans. Oh well.

Oh great. Habs game tonight. Maybe I can watch the Rangers and Avery irritate Rod instead of the Habs. Ugggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhh.

le sigh

I couldn't think of any pictures for today, so I went with this. Sue me.

I didn't really watch the Habs game last night, because it was just too stressful and sad. I guess that makes me a bad fan, but it was really just self preservation. I watched the Rangers/Caps game instead, because Rod really hates Sean Avery, and he gets so mad when Avery does something douchey. It's funny to watch Rod get mad! I personally find Sean Avery amusing. His antics are so douchey and over the top. This is not to say I like him, so hold your fire please. I think he is a very effective player for the Rangers, and he does silly things that make me laugh.

Flyers return to the ice tonight, and I return to the Wachovia Center for what I expect will be my last game this season. I don't think the Flyers will be able to pull another game like Sunday's out their asses, but we'll see. Can't wait to see if Giroux can tear shit up again. Maybe I will record the starting lineups and let you hear how loud the cheer for him will be. Bet it's louder than anyone else.

I had to get up at 6 am on Sunday to work 7-1 and then go to the game!

So you Flyers are lucky that was a good game, or I would be pissed.

I'm amazed that the crowd was so into it. I was apparently the only person who had no hope for a win (or even a good effort). I was pleasantly surprised.

I came home and watched the game on TV (weird, I know) and was amazed at how Pierre McGuire has the biggest boner for the Pens. But then I read the Pensblog, and they were pissed at how McGuire has a boner for Mike Richards. Amazing how two different fan bases can hate McGuire so much, but about the exact opposite thing. Honestly though, if you think the NBC broadcast had bias towards the Flyers, you are either retarded or deaf (no offense to either group). Seriously, NBC's job is to sing the praises of the annointed one and his team, no matter what.

I still hold no delusions that the Flyers can win this series, or even another game, but it was nice to be rewarded for getting up at the asscrack of dawn.

Also:

• I bet 4 out of 5 Flyers fans have a Giroux jersey by the end of the week.
• I do a lot of hockey card shopping on ebay (*cough* Kovalev *cough*) and I can tell you that Giroux cards today were going for 30 bucks and up. No lie. Check it yourself!
• I really need to get to sleep now!
• I think the Luden's are causing my tonsils to swell.
• I am so glad the Habs are not playing the Flyers. I would have gotten killed for wearing a Habs shirt.
• Oh Jared Ross...sorry about what I said about you earlier in the week. My bad.

Also, a quick word on penalties. Um. Hmm. Actually, no, I'm not going to get into it, but wow. Maybe a quick refresher course for the refs on what consitutes hooking, slashing, and what have you. Because honestly, I don't know what the fuck the refs are seeing out there, but it's getting kinda outta control...

Flyers get ready for loss number two, I get ready for a long nap.

I have no plans to watch tonight's Flyers game. I'm in need of sleep, and I am going to take a long nap and not set my alarm. So there. Take that Flyers! If you're not going to show up for the game, neither am I!

The hero and the goat (Kovy's not the goat...)

Gorges (the goat) likes when Kovalev scores. But not as much as I do.

Yeah, so that game didn't suck. Lots of energy, decent puck possesion, not terrible goal tending. I guess when you're expecting a bloodbath, and you only cut yourself shaving, it's not so bad. The Habs looked a hell of a lot better playing the Bruins than the Flyers did playing the Pens. Trust me.

I sitll hold no delusions that the Habs can win this thing, but at least they're going down fighting.

I'm trying to pull tape of that Kovalev goal, because man oh man was that sick. I can't even tell you how much I love when he does that. Unfreakingbelievable.

In non Habs news:

• WTF? Carcillo suspended, Stevens fined? Oy.

• Interesting thoughts on Carter and Richards being used too much on the PK and tiring themselves out. Looks like someone's trying to come up with explanations for losing the series already.

• Also, just a random question from the Flyers game...WTF is Jared Ross doing up with the big boys? He's seen like 5 games this year. Bring Noodle back.

• Gah, Carolina, you were supposed to be unstoppable. Ward, you better get your shit together before tomorrow night, because we all know Leights aint ready for the big time.

• Oh, I think I may be going to the stupid Flyers game on Sunday after all. Grrrr. They better not play like shit. Soph and Jess, I'll keep you posted if I change my mind. Right now there are still good tickets available...

• I'm addicted to Luden's cough drops.

Go Flyers! Go Canes! Go Rangers!

I am going to save a TON of money!

Guys, I'm so excited! When the Flyers lose in the first round, I won't have to pay for second round playoff tickets! No money spent on second round tickets = more money to spend on Habs stuff. This is such a win win situation!

Seriously though. I didn't expect the Flyers to win, and I did expect them to suck, but I did not expect them to suck that bad and get so badly dominated. Ouch. This team doesn't have the same heart as last year's playoff team, and I don't think they have the ability to bounce back like they did last year.

Now, last year, they lost game one in the first round and went on to win the series. But, as I just mentioned, this isn't the same team from last year. That team had momentum and was clicking and gelling and all the other things that great teams do. This team is just waiting. Waiting for what, I'm not sure. Maybe they are waiting for Upshall to come back. I dunno.

I've had some requests for my little stuffed Iceburgh to be abused, so I'll see if I can make that happen for Friday's game. Even if it doesn't help with a win, it will make us all feel better. Right? RIGHT!

Oh gosh, not the Pens again.

I had no idea Iceburgh was gay!

Sigh. Here we go again. Battle of Pennsylvania and all that crap. Seriously, the Flyers better get their shit together and quick. They've been playing like a team who doesn't care. Perhaps it's part of their master plan to lull opponents into thinking they're not a serious threat. Yeah, maybe that's it! Let's hope so, or we're all going to be rooting for Carolina in the next round.

So take a day to rest up, watch Sudden Death to get yourself in the mood to kick Iceburgh's ass, and let's go Flyers. Or something.

This has nothing to do with anything.

But Fletch always makes me laugh, and I need a laugh. Fletch F. Fletch kills me every time.